10.20.2006

Ball o' nerves

I've been neglecting Cancer Dad. That means, I think, to some degree that I've been neglecting my need to deal with this well. I've written a couple of posts that I threw out. It was good for me to write them, but nothing to share. Maybe I'll post one of them someday. Probably not.

Today I am sick. Scans. I have told others and myself that I'm not too worried about these. That it would seem unlikely that the cancer would have grown through this first round of the new treatment. That I don't expect them to be better, but that I don't expect them to be worse either.

And I don't. I don't expect them to be worse. But I am afraid that they will be. Very afraid.

5 comments:

JimII said...

It is my natural tendancy to try to empathize with people by finding a common emotional ground. So, I connect the post title with waiting for a result and I run through the times I've experienced such things. Waiting for "results" when they are important.

Then I shudder, and my eyes get a little teary when I try to wrap my heart & head around what such things mean to you guys. And how much it means over and over and over again.

I'm just nodding along with your story. Not like when you understand the person, but when you want to assure him or her you are still listening.

Love,
JimII

Josh Gentry said...

fingers crossed

Josh Gentry said...

And the news is good :-)

liza Yore said...

Great news out of New York. Hope you can exhale now. Enjoy the weekend.

wilablog said...

Thinking of you and wishing you strength. - W&C